Going into 9 Vids today, I thought, “I sure hope this website doesn’t live up to the name.” Fear not, my fellow porn enthusiasts, because a free tube with just nine dirty movies on it probably wouldn’t even get a mention here at ThePornDude, not unless they were nine really fucking good movies. I wouldn’t point you guys toward such a ghost town of potential blue balls, but I would direct your perverted attention to this next joint, especially if you’re into that kinky taboo stuff.
I’m not sure what the number in the title is even referencing, because 9Vids.com is a free tube devoted to the taboo family roleplay genre. Some folks will squirm in their seat and tell you it’s weird, freaky and unnatural, but there’s a reason it’s been a popular storytelling trope as far back as the days of Oedipus. Hell, maybe we’ve even reached the golden age of the format, because 9Vids gets close to six million visitors a month. I love going family style, so let’s see what kind of tomfoolery is on the menu today.
Keeping It All in the Family
At a glance, I thought 9 Vids was just another generic free tube posting a little of this and a little of that. The presentation is nothing special, a simple wall of thumbnails on a black background with a few ads and a logo at the top. It’s the content of those little preview images that first got me excited, and not just because it's full of beautiful women with their clothes off. You can find naked ladies on almost every site I’ve reviewed here at ThePornDude, but most sites don’t focus so tightly on the theme.
I think the curators here have put some extra effort into making sure the video titles line up with that theme. Some of the most recent uploads have names like The Dad Challenge, Protective Brother, When My Son Comes Home and Your Mom Wants To Show Off Her New Bikini. The video intros typically explain how everybody’s only step-related by marriage, not blood, but the titles dispense with that formality. You know the drill.
Even while sticking to the familial theme, 9Vids.com manages to roll in a fantastic range of hardcore depravity. These stepsiblings ain’t getting together for wholesome picnics, but they are making each other squirt, getting their pretty faces jizzed on, and even engaging in anal group sex from time to time. I like how the site’s Categories are a short list of family members like Mother, Daughter and Siblings, while the Tags index offers a big spread of porno subgenres, sex acts and scenarios.
The collection is well tagged, so you’ve got instant access to whole aisles of taboo smut in categories like Anal Cowgirl, Cumshot Compilation, Lesbian and Outdoor Sex. I have mixed feelings about hyper specific keywords like Big Jiggly Ass, though. I mean, I do love big jiggly asses, don’t get me wrong, but too many tags in the same general category make the stash a little harder to browse; they’ve also got Big Round Booty, Bouncing Ass, Big Ass Mom, Fat Ass, Big Butt, Bubble Butt and a bunch of other overlapping tags.
Girls I Know and Ones I Want To
The porn subgenres are well-tagged at 9Vids.com, but I was a little disappointed to find they don’t currently have a browsable Pornstars page. That’s a bummer, because there are recognizable pornstars everywhere I look. One of the first familiar faces I saw out front was the adorable Coco Lovelock, who I had the privilege of getting to know really fucking well on the PornDudeCasting couch. Gigi Dior, Sophia Locke, Athena Heart, Aderes Quin, and Lana Smalls are just a few more costars I spotted within minutes of landing.
It shouldn’t come as any kind of surprise given the theme, but the whole site is a fucking goldmine of pornstar MILFs. If you’re into cougars, the Mother and Aunty categories are going to be your jam, even if the family thing ain’t necessarily what you’re into. Cory Chase is in a ton of the movies featured on the site, as are world-class hotties like Jenna Starr, Desiree Dulce and Laura Bently. Oh, and I’ve got to shout out a few more of my PornDudeCasting mamas, like Lolly Dames, Justine Jakobs, and Lauren Phillips.
9Vids’ selection of Amateur movies offers an array of low-fi pornographic treats for connoisseurs of the taboo genre. A lot of them look legitimately homemade, many from the pre-smartphone era. While the video resolution is generally lower in this section of the site, the low production values help sell the illusion even more than high-budget taboo pictures. Still, it’s hard to be a porn expert poking his dick around a stash like this, because I recognize so many of the women. Those girls aren’t really sisters!
More Than Just 9 Vids--It’s Over 9,000!
I already told you in the intro that 9Vids doesn’t actually have just 9 vids, but I didn’t tell you it’s really just a matter of zeros at this point. To date, the stash has just over 9000 videos samples. I know some of the nerds are expecting me to make a specific joke here, but sorry, this ain’t a hentai site. I did find a nice selection of cosplay movies and Japanese Adult Video (JAV), though, so they’ve got plenty to keep the weebs entertained.
What I didn’t find was upload dates. I always like to tell you guys how often any stash grows, whether we’re talking about free or premium pornography. Consistent updates give you a reason to come back over and over again on your daily masturbatory rounds, so I wish I could give you a hard number here. They do accept user uploads, though, so that heavy traffic should translate into a nice, steady stream of new content. The current numbers sure back that up.
On some sites, you get new content every time you refresh the front page, but it’s a little slower going with any kind of porno sub-niche. I will say, though, that the latest 9 Vids movies out front are fucking fantastic. The very freshest scene is a 16-minute chubby stepdaughter taboo video that looks to have been shot in a motel room. The chick’s got a cute face and a beautifully big booty, and frankly, it makes me wish 9Vids had a Download button. I guess I’ll just have to bookmark it for later.
And They’ve Got Whole-Ass Movies, Too
9Vids lists the video durations right below the titles out front, so I knew right away this wasn’t a strictly quality tube. There are plenty of paysite sample scenes running around ten minutes or so, and the amateur taboo vids tend to be even shorter. That said, there’s a fair amount of quality content here for anyone looking for a nice marathon fap.
I got a video ad before each video I watched today, but I think it’s a small price to pay, especially when you can settle in for a nice, long scene. As I wrap up this review, I’m watching Evie Christian in a 43-minute film called Studying the Reproductive System. They say learning is a lifelong process, so I’m glad to have found this training material. It opens with a POV blowjob, Evie comparing the dingdong in her face to the one in the book she’s reading. The whole thing gives new meaning to the phrase “cramming for a test”.
9Vids didn’t make the video, but they did build the vehicle that’s delivering it straight to my laptop, and what an efficient vehicle it is! The whole movie streams smoothly and looked crisp as hell even in full screen mode, and it doesn’t hiccup when I flip around through different segments of the vid. I think you’ll understand when I tell you I’m in a real hurry to finish this review.
I’m planning on spending the rest of the day enjoying the 9Vids.com collection, but we’ll see how long I actually last. These guys have one of the best dedicated collections of pseudo-taboo movies samples I’ve seen in a while: it’s vast and wide-ranging, features your favorite adult stars, and sticks tightly to that taboo theme you came here for in the first place. This one’s worth writing home about, my dudes. Tell your mom I said Hey.
